Gladly, I are not 'there' yet. I have not yet arrived. There is still learning and growth and challenges before me. How you perceive this, I think, will have a major effect on how you view the outcome.... or better yet, how you view the future adventures ahead.
I, for one, hope never to have 'arrived.' To have arrived means that I have learned and experienced all there is out there to learn or experience. To have arrived means I am now the person I have hoped to become in this lifetime. If I am 'there,' then there is nothing left to stimulate or grow, entertain, or challenge me.
I am clearly not there yet. I have not yet arrived. Technically (hopefully) I am midlife right now. If not midlife, then the alternative is that I will have a shorter than expected life, and I am not up for that. Nor would I want to live past any usefulness. I want a life that gives me around 75 or 80 years of a productive life.
So, hopefully, I am past the petty, silly, inconsequential crap. I am beyond the stuff that really does not matter. I hope and pray I am past being selfish and rude because I think I am better than someone else. (come one... if you want to be honest with yourself, you have thought this at some point in your life---with some circumstance, AT LEAST once. whether it is a person who lacks fashion. Or maybe style. Or education---that's a viable one-up, right??? Those who have degrees are CLEARLY better than the ignorant...right? And, ones living situation. You live, where? Oh. Uh huh. That's nice. I am SO glad I don't live like THAT!)
The reality, in my estimation, even if you might harbor some pride inside your heart, is that we are no better than the least of these. We simply are no better than the least of these. No matter what you think you possess.
Years ago I was treating a gal who just happened to be a prostitute. She had come to the ED with viable medical needs. But during my nursing assessment of her, I discovered that she had been raped by 4 men whom she had been "partying" with that night. What we were treating her for was nothing related to this, but still, I stayed with her. I sat with her for a bit, offering her social work services and treatment for rape, which she refused.
She detailed the events of the evening. She told me everything. I told her she had the right not only to be checked and treated for this, but to have the police find the men who did this. Right??? A woman who had four men force sex has the right to protest?
No, she said. Who would believe her? She is a prostitute. Not only, who is going to believe her, but she was "partying" (drugging) with them, so she deserved it, right? AND, she said, "I have been down that road before, and it's not worth it."
So, I treated this gal for her ER needs and sent her on her way, at her request. But she obviously made an impression on my mind and in my career. And it's peculiar; her impression wasn't just because of her circumstance or plight, but more-so because of my perception/viewpoint of her. You never know what someone has lived until you have been through it with them. But for the grace of god, go I. And, honestly, even in the midst of grace and other peaceful things..... this gal was just as important as me, if not more so.
I hope and pray I am not "there yet." Help me grow and learn. Give me MORE compassion (yes, yes: i have oft said that "i hate people,"), teach me LOVE and mercy. I have so much to learn. So much to grow into. I have NOT arrived. And I want never to have arrived~!.
